i was looking at our photographs. An all starry eyed 19yr old me head over heels in love with the tall dark handsome man standing beside me. Full of hope for the future together. Looking at both of us then no one would have predicted us spiltting in couple of months. I remember all my frnds telling me how lucky i was to have found a man as loving and caring as him. in retospect i feel that shayad humare pyaar ko kissi ki nazar lag gayi. We were happy and head over heels in love with each other was very much obvious. Ppl used to compliment us for we made a very cute couple. Kind of Mills and Boons one. We both complemented each other well. It was as if in dream. Everything was too good to be true.
But i forgot that dreams never realize themselves in reality. They r just dreams- stupid, foolish dreams. Dreams of a young naive starry eyed head over heels in love girl.
I wonder y we cant be together? Why? Why am i to go thru all this hurt and pain? Why did we meet if there was no future for us? Y did God made me fall in love with him wen HE had plans of being together? Why did god play such a cruel game with our lives? Making us fall in love all in futile?
Why inspite of all these years i cant forget him? why cant i stop loving him? why cant i move ahead in life? why do i keep comparing every man i meet with him? Why do all men look like pale shadows wen compared with him?
Dil jude bina hi tut gaye hath mile bina hi chhut gaye
Ki likhe ne lekh kismet ne
Baar baar rod akhiyan tainu jo na vekh sakiyan
Khole aaye aaj kudrat ne
Kataan main ki ve din teri soth tere bin
Main toh jiya na mara
I dont want to waste words for the song describes all my feelings the best. One can never appreciate the beauty of a song unless one finds himself in the same situation as expressed in the song. The pain, heartbreak, the emptyness engulfs u and chokes u with lonliness and memories haunting u day in day out with no respite!
the dreams u have woven come crashing down u deafening u with its “silence”. Yes ironically, wen u heart is shredded into a million pieces or wen ur dreams are “murdered” not a sound could be heard. All u hear is silence. U whole world is crashing, shattering all around u and none can even hear a sound! I pray to God that nobody goes thru heartbreak ever. Its worse than death! Believe me. The torture of slow death can be felt in living a life without the one u love. U r reduced to a zondie. A living dead!
Main toh jiya na mara
Hai ve das main ki kara
Dil jude bina hi tut gaye hath mile bina hi chhut gaye
Ki likhe ne lekh kismet ne
Baar baar rod akhiyan tainu jo na vekh sakiyan
Khole aaye aaj kudrat ne
Kataan main ki ve din teri soth tere bin
Main toh jiya na mara
Chan Se jo tute koi sapna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Koi rahe na jab apna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Jag suna suna
Hai to yeh kyun hota hai Jab yeh dil rota hai
Roye sisak sisak ki hawayein
Jag suna lage
Chan Se jo tute koi sapna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Koi rahe na jab apna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage reeeeeeeee
Suna Lage Reee
Roothi rothi sari raatein
Fikhe fikhe sare din
Virani si Virani hai
Tanhai si tanhai hai
Aur ek hum hai pyaar ke bin
Har Palchin
Chan Se jo tute koi sapna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Koi rahe na jab apna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Patharo ki is nagari mein
Pathar chehre Pathar dil
Phirta hai mara mara
Kyun rahon mein tu awara
Yahan na hoga Kuch hasil mere dil
www.smsnshayari.com
Chan Se jo tute koi sapna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Koi rahe na jab apna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Hai to yeh kyun hota hai
Jab yeh dil rota hai
Roye sisak sisak ki hawayein
Jag suna lage
Chan Se jo tute koi sapna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage
Koi rahe na jab apna
JAg suna suna lage
Jag suna suna lage reeeeeeeee
People had been telling me that since i am young, i would forget him soon. That i would fall in love again. But do any of these ppl know anything abt my love for Him? The intensity, the depth of my emotions? Do any of them know the moments which we had spent 2gether? Sharing laughter, tears, disappointments, achievements. Do any of them know how deep the memories the etched not in my mind, but in my heart! I can physically be hundreds nad hundreds of miles away from him but my heart remains with him. It is where we had been together doing things together, sharing our lives together. Our disappointments, our achievements together. I left my heart behind in those moments of tender love, intense passion. I left it in the fun filled days of love and laughter. Our laughter still echoes in my mind. Everywhere i go memories flodd back into my mind. Even simple things like listening to music brings back memories.
How does one get rid of these memories? HOW? When he is embedded deep in my soul! Love has changed me and i can never go back to being what i was before. No amount of time, or distance going to fade away my love for him. How can any girl forget her first love?
I believe in the saying that a woman never forgets her first love where as a man never forgets his last love. I wasnt His last love. But he was my first and last. I can never love another man the way i loved him. I am sorry. I am just not capable of the same intensity again.
P.S No wasnt 16 wen i fell in love with him. I was 19.
Here’s a song which summarizes my feelings quite emphatically. It’s a song frm the hit movie “Ek Duje Ke Liye”
Koshish Kar Ke Dekh Le
Dariya Saare Nadiya Saari
Dil Ki Lagi Nahin Bujhti,
Bujhti Hai Har Chingari Solah Baras Ki Baali Umar Ko Salaam
Aye Pyar Teri Pehli Nazar Ko Salaam
Duniya Mein Sabse Pehle Dilbar Ko Salaam
Dilse Nikalne Waale Raste Ka Shukriya
Dil Tak Pahunchne Wali Dagar Ko Salaam
Aye Pyar Teri …
Jis Mein Jawaan Hokar Badnaam Hum Huye
Us Shehar Us Gali Us Ghar Ko Salaam
Jisne Humein Milaaya, Jisne Juda Kiya
Us Waqt, Us Ghadi, Us Pal Ko Salaam
Aye Pyar Teri…
Milte Rahe Yahan Hum Yeh Hai Jahan Likha
Us Likhavat Ki Jero Jabar Ko Salaam
In Mast Gehri Gehri Aankhon Ke Jheel Mein
Jisne Humein Duboya Us Bhanwar Ko Salaam
Ghoonghat Ko Todkar Jo Sarse Sarak Gayi
Aisi Nigodi Dhani Chunar Ko Salam
Aye Pyar Teri…
Ulfat Ke Dushmano Ne Koshish Hazar Ki
Phir Bhi Nahin Jhuki Jo Us Nazar Ko Salaam
Aye Pyar Teri…
Gazals are my fav genre of msuic. Not many ppl my age like them. infact they dest it. But i simply love it. I think gazals have the best expressions of an emotion. Beutiful! Divine! The best thing is taht the interpretation is open ended. Each individula experience enriches the meaning of the song, giving it a depth which is simply incredible.
Anyway, this is a new year. New beginning. But
Chupke chupke raat din aansoon bahaana yaad hai
Hum ko ab tak aashiqui ka woh zamaana yaad hai
Tujh se milte hi woh kuchh bebaak ho jaana mera
Aur tera daanton mein woh ungali dabaana yaad hai
[bebaak=bold, outspoken]
Chori chori hum se tum aa kar mile the jis jagaah
Muddatein guzareen par ab tak wo thikaana yaad hai
[muddatein=length of time, guzareen=passed, thikaana=location]
Khench lenaa wo mera parde ka konaa daffatan
Aur dupatte mein tera woh munh chhupaana yaad hai
[daffatan=suddenly]
Tujh ko jab tanhaa kabhii paana to az raah-e-lihaaz
Haal-e-dil baaton hi baaton mein jataanaa yaad hai
[tanhaa=alone, paana=to find, az raah-e-lihaaz=with caution]
Aa gaya gar vasl ki shab bhi kahin zikr-e-firaaq
Woh tera ro-ro ke bhi mujhko rulaana yaad hai
[vasl=meeting, shab=night, zikr=mention, firaaq=separation]
Dopahar ki dhoop mein mere bulane ke liye
Woh tera kothe pe nangey paaon aana yaad hai [kotha=loft]
They r just dreams- stupid, foolish dreams. Dreams of a young naive starry eyed head over heels in love girl.
